Murdering Snacktime

What's the attraction of snacks? At our house, the crunchy, salty, sweet, creamy, cool, spicy flavors of chips, nuts, chocolates, ice cream, sour cream, and salsa fill the evening hours. Whew! That's a whole lot of munching going on.

Unfortunately for my waistline, television time evokes snack time for me. Never mind that I had an excellent dinner. Never mind that it was only an hour to an hour-and-a-half ago that I consumed it. Never mind that we watch shows that are pretty non-conducive to snacks. Really, who wants to munch on guacamole while watching the fictional Dr. Brennan slog through slimy, sludge gathering decomposing body parts on Bones? I do. Who wants to slurp a bright red strawberry smoothie through two straws while watching the gang from CSI measure spatter patterns and blood puddles? I do. And, who wants to crunch on smokehouse almonds while listening to the profilers on Criminal Minds discuss how a serial killer removes his victims' fingernails? Well, I do...I do...I do.

I can't help myself. Scenes that would make me retch in real life are fascinating on television and never keep me from gnawing on an evening snack. Once, a forensic guy pulled some eyeballs out of a tub of muck just as I bit into the queen olive and cocktail onion at the bottom of my martini glass. Not only did this not seem particularly icky, I found the timing amusingly ironic.

So, am I a serial killer in disguise? As much as I enjoy wielding large knives, taking out my aggressions on bread dough, and beating eggs to foamy, frothy goodness, I don't think my family needs to sleep with loaded weapons under their pillows. I'll save my murderous mayhem for television snack time turning myself into a cereal killer armed with a spoon, stalking the vanilla-coated Cheerios and chocolate milk.